I’ve been thinking lately about life, religion, and how to perceive GOD.  There are many reasons I started contemplating these, MOSTLY BOREDOM, and THANKFULNESS.

The boredom is brought on by my disability and not being able to work.  The Thankfulness is for everyone in my life that I love and my two kitties who mean the world to me; especially Ringo who has diabetes.  Everyday I thank GOD for these people and say a prayer for Ringo and hope that he suffers no pain due to this illness.  God knows everytime he sees me I’m sticking him with either a lancet to measure his blood glucose, or a needle for insulin, and yet another needle for his arthritis pain.  Not to mention the medication I have to squirt into his mouth for tooth and gum pain.  His teeth and gums are terrible with everything you could imagine, he gets an antibiotic shot every two weeks prophylactically because he can’t have surgery until his BG is stabilized.  It has been running over 500 and their parameters are the same as ours, 70-120, but they can tolerate higher levels easier than a human.  Otherwise he doesn’t act very different, when his sugar is high he is a little bit sleepier, and low he meows loudly for food.  I see him as not so bad off in pain that he should be put to sleep.  Or am I selfish.  I don’t think so.

Now the religion part;  Are these prayers for my loved ones really being answered or are we just seeing a string of coincidences?  And how many coincidences does it take to make us realize that there is someone watching over us.  I always thought KARMA played a role, when bad things happened to bad people.  But then I’ve seen a lot of GOOD PEOPLE (or so I think are good) go through tremendous pain and suffering.  Which brings my next question up, are good people supposed to suffer like Jesus did on the cross in order to get to heaven when they die.  I don’t know how many times I’ve seen or heard how really bad people get away with murder and are always catching breaks, yet good people suffer.  If this is true then my latter theory would hold water more.

God, what is he/she/it?  Is this omnipotent being a person, or is it the nature and energy around us, or both.  I saw a mud  puddle in a whole different light this past summer.  While I was staring into it I saw a perfect reflection of the trees and leaves and sky….and I thought what a beautiful mirror for everything good, which brought me to think that God IS everywhere and his omnipotence is in everything around us.  I also believe (I think) that our loved ones who have passed are meant to look out for us so when you ask for God to look out for you should add the names of those that died and were close to you too.  I think we as human beings are responsible to watch out for our loved ones in life and death, and I think those that don’t complete it satisfactorily will have to do it after they die or maybe regardless of either they just do.

I’ve always thought that RELIGION is another form of prejudice so I’ve opted out.  Not that I didn’t try every religion there is to test it out 🙂  I started going to Bible class when I was about  8 or 9, there was a bus that would come and pick us up.  No one asked or suggested I go, I just saw a flyer at school about it happening in the summer. (FUNNY, you sure CANT post any RELIGIOUS flyers nowadays without getting sued for discrimination or at least screamed at by people and politicians).  Anyway every Sunday I would go there and before Bible class we sat thru about 20 minutes of church; and the pastor would always ask  if anyone wanted to be saved by Jesus Christ so I would walk up to the podium and get splashed with water over their bowl or tub (baptized).  I did this for about five Sundays in a row, until the pastor took me aside and told me you only need one baptism to have your sins forgiven.  I wasn’t embarrassed, too young for that, I just thought I was more ahead of the game due to other people only getting it done once:)

There are so many questions, and while religious people tell you not to question God, that is BULL.  God would want us to question him, to learn more about him.  I’ve never denied that God exists  I just want to know in what form or matter, all the more reason to have respect for what you know.  I will always have free time on my hands or even if I don’t I will always have questions and love for an entity I can’t ever be sure of, but who are we HUMANS to ever think we know what GOD or HEAVEN is?   No one knows, and I’m not sure I believe wholly in the “light at the end of the tunnel stuff, especially when I’ve caught people in exaggerating about the event….but then maybe it does exists….Like I said who am I to pretend to know anything about God or his motives.  I DO BELIEVE though that GOD DID OR DOES NOT CONDONE TERRORISM.  There is no God that would warrant such torture or hatred that comes with these Islamic terrorist, or serial killers or anyone who uses their position to advocate hatred, torture and death.

I lived in IRAN with a lot of Islamic extremist and what I saw and went through in that POW camp was horrific.  Do I stop for a minute and think was I that bad in the past to warrant such torture?  Maybe I was, maybe I was not.  But the important thing I believe is that I made it home ALIVE and am able to share with everyone my story.  Regardless what it was for;  information, education, inspiration, or self help the story has helped many people (or so I’m told).  Even if it helps one person it was worth it.  Also had I not gone through the torture in Iran, would I have met John.  I truly think that if he was my light at the end of the tunnel I would do it again.

So there you have it my vanity card (or sermon) do with it what you may I just had to get this off my chest and find out what your opinions are on these subjects.

I welcome your comments.

Have a great day, a great week, and the best in life.

Lori