My FIRST interview !

Hi all !

I just ran across this and decided to share it with you.  I wrote my book in 2008-2009, and it was published in July, 2009.  After it first came out I was getting interview requests and wasn’t sure how and if I should respond.  My book had just came out and I was scared I might say the wrong thing.  Well I FINALLY learned as long as you tell the TRUTH in EVERYTHING in life then you will never answer wrong or have anything to regret.

So here it is and I’d love your opinions.  Thank you, Lori

Monday, September 14, 2009

REVIEW and Q&A: Lori’s Song by Lori Foroozandeh

*sigh* My apologies to Lori Foroozandeh for taking so long to get this posted. Everything tends to happen at once, doesn’t it? So I’ve been working late hours and just haven’t had the time to devote to this, so that I could attempt to do Lori justice.I was lucky enough to receive a review copy of Lori Foroozandeh’s new book Lori’s Song: The true story of an American woman held captive in Iran. Here is the synopsis that comes from the publishers page:

Her name is Lori Foroozandeh, and this is her true story.

Lori lived her young years as a victim of abuse. As she grew older she fell into a classic pattern of self-destructiveness. But by the time she was twenty-seven, she was doing her utmost to create a sane life.

Mohammad Foroozandeh seemed like a man she could trust, a man who would care for her and respect her. Though she knew he engaged in drug use, she ignored the warning signs and married him. Two years later, he asked her to move to Iran, promising that she could pursue her career, assuring her that the country was quite modern. For four years, Lori adjusted as best she could to the oppressive customs of the land, but as her husband grew more demanding of her, he also became more violent.

After the World Trade Center bombings, Mohammad told her they must leave Iran. He purchased bus tickets that he said would take them out of the country and eventually to America. But before they could escape, armed guards attacked and kidnapped her. Lori was blindfolded and taken to a paramilitary POW camp somewhere in the hills.

Then the nightmare began…. six weeks of horrific beatings, raping, torture, and starvation.

This was a very heavy read, but an important story that I wanted to help share and “get the word out”. And Lori was kind enough to take time out to answer some questions for me.

Q&A with author Lori Foroozandeh:


Q:
Often people will try to see the “silver lining” in their trials and tribulations. Do you think that perhaps your difficult childhood helped to prepare you for your difficult time in Iran? Someone with less endurance and unprepared by the often harsh realities of life would probably have been less likely to have survived.

A:
I don’t know if this is always true or we just start reacting when we are in that situation. Believe it or not I never thought about a silver lining while in that camp, all I thought about was surviving minute to minute.

My childhood could have prepared me subconsciously that my life “sucked” so far, so this is all I have to look forward to in the future. But had this been the case I wouldn’t have kept on trying to “get it right”.

Q: There are some contradictions that really struck me. Mainly the biggest one was the contrast between the mother in the introduction and the mother in the rest of the memoir. For instance, while your mother in the introduction was described as somewhat uncaring, she is described elsewhere in the book as loving and you seem to have a decent relationship with her. She calls you in Iran to check on you. When you call her from the encampment, you describe how grateful you were to have her voice on the phone.

“A familiar voice from my past, someone who loved me and truly cared about my well-being.”

Can you describe more your relationship with your mother? It seems very complicated, and you seem conflicted. Almost a “love-hate” sort of relationship. There does seem to have been love there, but also resentment and perhaps distrust?

A: The reason for this is when I originally wrote this as I described in the Foreword, I wrote it with no intention of mudslinging. So I just generalized what all families were like. Then the more I got into therapy about my childhood, I was not only told to change the book but felt it was necessary to
relate to others that were abused.

Originally the foreword was not even going to be in the book when I first wrote it in 2002. ( And believe it or not I am just now reading it cover to cover, I had to have my fiancé proof read it for errors, the second time around. My literary agent corrected it the first time. Still today it is too difficult to read certain chapters).

As I was saying It was just focused on my experience in Iran.

As you will note in the foreword I did say something to the effect that I was going to keep the book as it was so people could see how people like “us” i.e. sexually abused children: would go to lengths to protect those around them.

When I was a child as stated I was adopted, and as noted all the time growing up I thought that if I came forward to my mother with what my brother was doing then my mother would hate me.

Remember I thought that she approved or didn’t mind that this was happening.

Eventually I tried to tell my mother and I always got the same response, “I don’t have time to talk right now”.

My mother was caring to a degree and lets face it she was the only mother I knew. Sometimes growing up we see only the good in our parents, or at least try to justify their actions with the intent of being good.

It’s not until we reach adulthood or “enlightenment” do we truly understand the whole “gist” of things.

Yes she did call me in Iran to check on me, she was even friends with Mohammad or so I thought. I also didn’t know Mohammad had been borrowing money from my mom and paying her back with big interest checks until later. Considering how much money he had I can only reason that this was
money laundering. After all why would any small town bank suspect a older lady to be laundering money. Especially considering the length of time she had that account.

When I called my mother from the camp of course I was appreciative of her voice. My mother and I had our ups and downs, mostly downs, but still there were moments. And when your being held prisoner in a camp half way around the world not knowing if you would be dead or alive the next day, any voice from your past would be welcoming and caring. Especially if they were the only one who could help you at all.

Also remember I didn’t find out a lot of “truths” about my mother until I came home and after her death. She always kept us children separate from each other, by saying I will do this for you but don’t tell your sister, and vice versa. She would also make statements about how your sister thinks she is too good for you and that is why she doesn’t speak to you. For some reason my mother was intent on keeping our family from unity.

You can verify this with my sister Luci with whom I’ve come to reconcile with since returning.

Q: By the way, in regards to Faresh putting bread in your infected wounds, bread poultices have commonly been used in “folk medicine” for centuries to combat infections and gangrene. Remember that penicillin grows in bread and yeast. Evidently Faresh had probably learned this from a grandmother or some wise old woman.

A: Yes your probably right, as a nurse I just couldn’t think of things to do at all, just getting water and bits of food was important to me, it seemed like that was all I could focus on. A lot of people in the middle east or for that matter people who are in less “spoiled” nations as the USA, count on their wise advice from mothers and grandmother. Unlike here we always have some shot or vaccine to prevent something so we don’t have to worry about it. Our country might have hungry people but very rarely do you hear about a disease that emerged from the homeless community. At least in my view.

Q: You include a picture in your book of you and Mohammad on your wedding day. I noted how sad your eyes look in this photo. Do you know what you were thinking? What were your hopes for your future with Mohammad? Did you have any inkling of the “real” man that seemed to be hiding behind the charade?

A: I didn’t notice that they were sad looking, but looking back and this wasn’t on our wedding day, but on our reception day; anyway….now that you bring that to my attention, I suppose I did feel confused and scared about what I got myself into. I can’t say for certain what I was pondering, but I’m sure I was also on Vicodin that day and probably wondering if I would ever kick that habit as well.

Q: It seems that no one wanted to believe your story. Have you had any corroboration to support your story, to garner you some weight in the media and help get your story out there? What about medical records that show scar tissue and x-rays to prove your claims of brutal abuse? The media should be all over this story!

I would think that part of the problem with verifying your story is the fact that it occurred in Iran– a country known for hiding behind a veil of secrecy, especially when it comes to America. They don’t seem to like America to know what is going on there.

A: Yes there are medical records, I arrived home weighing 70 pounds,. there was an ambulance waiting at the airport. As far as medical records sure there are but I’m not going to get into a “pissing” contest with people over my story. It’s there, I wrote it, I’m not asking for notoriety, if I were I would have been hounding every talk show I could have when I got back. Instead I just opted for a newspaper article and NOT one in the National Enquirer:).

My therapist pushed me into publishing this telling me I owed it as a testament to people that have been through what I’ve been through: i.e. childhood sexual abuse, domestic violence, bipolar, and going to a foreign country.

I can’t prove anything except “still” being in therapy for it now, and to top it off, I just went through rehab in October 2008, so this is the first time I’ve had to deal with it SOBER! My therapist gave me the “WONDERFUL” news that now this will be like dealing with it for the FIRST TIME.

There were a lot of memories I try to forget but which eventually come out in PTSD episodes. Including one that lasted four hours and I was taken to U of M, paralyzed and a respirator was put in me, due to them not being able to calm me down and thought I had spinal meningitis, while in the examining room they were doing the spinal tap and I woke up and could feel the needle since the paralyzation (sic) only made your muscles that way not your nerves. To top it off they had an intern doing the procedure who had to stick me THREE TIMES! He was afraid to do it after the second time and one of the doctors stated, “Oh she can’t feel anything, if you can flap your arms Ms. Johnson” I told them when I finally could open my eyes and they took the respirator out everything they said. I was kept for an epileptic monitoring stay, but it was a little hard for them to analyze me when they had to keep me on Morphine for seven days due to their MISTAKE! This is when I quit going to U of M M!


Q:
What do you hope will come of your disclosure of your time in the camp? Is it merely cathartic? Or do you hope that it will somehow help or change things?

A: Of course I hope that a LOT comes from this disclosure. The first and most important point I want to make is:

  1. THIS IS NOT A STORY ABOUT PREJUDICE TOWARDS THE IRANIAN PEOPLE OR THE ISLAMIC RELIGION.YOU CAN’T HATE THE WHOLE RELIGION OR THE RACE FOR WHAT A FEW FANATICS DO. IF THIS WERE THE CASE WE WOULD ALL HAVE TO HATE THE WHITE MALE RACE FOR WHAT TIMOTHY MCVEIGH OR CHARLIE MANSON DID!
  2. Second, I hope that it encourages more victims of child abuse to come forward. I truly believe the more a subject is talked about the less likely it is to happen. I.e. the perps won’t be so likely to commit this act if they know people and especially children are encouraged to talk about it. And yes I’m sure it was cathartic to a degree. I can sleep a lot better now;)
  3. I hope that people will go to my website and talk about not only bi-polar disorder which is so misunderstood, but also substance abuse, and domestic violence. I am not the only one to suffer from these problems, but if more people come together, and it’s sad to say but true when someone puts the issues to ink and a book becomes popular for whatever reason then usually more people will be encouraged to come forward and we can try to create public awareness about the “TRUTHS” of these issues.
  4. Finally I hope that people who are thinking about traveling to a foreign country especially as a wife of that person, I pray to GOD that they find out the laws of that country. Not only as a visitor but as the wife or child of the person they are visiting with. I never knew that you needed your husbands written permission to leave Iran. I didn’t know that public executions for adultery were still being practiced. There was so much that I was ignorant to.I just went because I trusted my husband to tell me the truth.

Q: What was the hardest thing about your imprisonment?

A: Two events actually:

The first is being touched on the shoulder by God and being told that I was going home the next night. I will never forget that. I still get a warm feeling in my stomach when I think of that moment. And the second:

Watching what the other girls went through. Seeing that man go out and must have seen his son executed, broke my heart. Seeing Faresh’s family watching her get publicly raped just killed me. I know this sounds textbook but it truly was the hardest thing. Watching what happened to other
people. I guess when you watch what happens to others, in your mind it somehow simulates what it would be like if this happened to you or your family if they were watching. And you know deep down it would kill them.

Q: You said in an email to me that you “didn’t want to go with the bigger publishing companies like Simon and Schuster because they just wanted to edit the book so much and make me out to be ‘Miss Perfect’ thus devoid my drug addiction. I wanted to share that in the book as well as my bipolar and sexual abuse because I believe the more you talk about abuse the less it will happen.” I get this. One of my favorite quotes is “The only good is knowledge, the only evil ignorance.” Only through knowledge can things change.

A: So true. Also I believe that ordinary people say extraordinary things and extraordinary people say ordinary things. This is always been my rule, thus it’s more important to listen to the people that are living day to day around you than it is to listen to some TV or movie star. They only say what their publicist allows them to say. This book says everything, My life is OUT THERE…an OPEN BOOK:)

Q: How is Douger today?

A: Douger is doing much better. He got his parole for March of 2010, so we both are eagerly awaiting this.

Q:Why have you decided to keep your last name, at least for the purpose of the book? I realize that the events in Iran happened to “Lori Foroozandeh”, and I was curious whether that is why “she” is the one telling the story? I would think that, after your ordeal, you would be eager to shed your ex-husband’s name.

A: I did want to shed it at first for a lot of reasons but my thinking was not clear then. I took back the name, because your right it happened to Lori Foroozandeh, and lets face it if readers were to look at a book like this written by Lori JOHNSON, it just wouldn’t fit the bill so to speak.

Q:I’m a “life is too short for regrets” kind of a gal. Do you have any regrets? Or is life too short for regrets?

A: I’m not sure how to answer that. I’ve never been one to sit around and think about regrets, it could have been due to my drug use, but there were things I’ve done wrong in my life, lets face it a life full of bad decision making. I’ve been severely depressed but not really regretful, and I’m sorry if this offends people, but my whole life I guess has been, “lets get onto the next experience or event”, I’m sure it has something to do with the bipolar and the drug use or maybe not. What I have been as I said was severely depressed, and now thanks to Prozac:), my fiancé John, and my two wonderful doctors, and rehab, I am now starting to look at life and my relationships with “EXCITEMENT”…gawd did I say that. My son won’t recognize my good decision making and actual optimistic outlook on life now. Yes and I thank God for that everyday.

Q: What’s your favorite motto or “words to live by”?

A: I wrote this back in 2002 after returning and am still a believer in it to the utmost: This and my saying above about that ordinary people say extraordinary things….etal.

While Terrorism is a war that starts developing within the mind,
Religion is a war that antagonizes our conscience, but
Love is a war within the heart…..

Lori F. 5/2002 Share The Peace!

Q: How are you doing now?

A: I’m doing OKAY!:) My son is getting paroled, and I have a wonderful man and I now have learned how to survive in a relationship without drugs.

He has supported me all the way and I can’t believe that God has blessed me with him.

When I say supported me all the way, he truly has loved me through all my terrible actions and mean behaviors to help produce the LORI OF TODAY. He doesn’t drink, do drugs, hit me, or even smoke, and he doesn’t have any felonies, my father would be proud:)

The first 40 years were anything but good, but I think the next 40 years will be GREAT!

Q: Is there anything else that you would like to say, or to share with my readers?

A: I just want to say thank you for asking questions that I’m sure everyone has had on their mind. Even me after I started proof reading it a little too late. But I hope I explained why in the foreword, if it is still confusing I apologize.

Thanks so much, Lori, for giving me the opportunity to read your story and for taking the time to answer a “few” questions. And now for my review of the book…

My Thoughts

Lori’s Song is a very heartfelt and heart-wrenching story of Lori’s imprisonment in an Iranian POW camp just after 9/11. However it is much more than that, as it also touches on her childhood, her earlier life with her Iranian husband Mohammad, and the culture of Iran, among other things.

I found that the writing-style could be a little disjointed, the thoughts a little scattered, so it didn’t “flow” like a lyrically well-written novel by an experienced author. And at times it can be a little repetitive. However this is a memoir, not a novel, and it reads more like a letter from your girlfriend who is sharing her sorrows and triumphs with you. It was real. There didn’t seem to be the heavy editing or guidance in the structure of the story or maintaining a good flow that can be expected with a big publishing company. The book is riddled with misspellings and grammatical errors. But it’s a very personal memoir. It was Lori’s conscious decision to not go with a large publishing outfit, as she didn’t want them to heavily edit her story. And I understand this.

I don’t want any criticisms to detract from this story, as I think that it is important to read. As I’ve said before, one of my favorite mottos is “The only good is knowledge and the only evil ignorance.” We must not be ignorant, and Lori has graciously and bravely bared her soul and her life to us so that we may be knowledgeable of the possible dangers of being an American in a country like Iran. She hasn’t sugar-coated her own past behaviour or actions. She has laid it all on the table. For that I thank her.

She mentions at one point that she heard that anyone possessing an American passport was picked up, but was unsure the reasoning behind it. My own half-baked theory is that perhaps it was in preparation of an attack by the US, to have a bargaining tool or use them to create a barrier. Lori said herself that it was believed that America would lash out at all middle eastern countries for retribution. Or perhaps it was simply fueled by a hatred of America, and there was no point other than for “fun” and revenge against “the big Satan”.

The bottom line is this: Read it! It is graphically violent, disturbing and heart-breaking, but it is also important. If you are of a sensitive nature, perhaps you should stray away from reading the book, because there is some very disturbing imagery, and it is real. It isn’t “just a story”. I was prepared for what I read. I was aware of the atrocities that go on in other countries, I’ve read other accounts outlining how it is culturally acceptable in some areas for a father to kill his daughter for the merest of infractions, of a young teen girl who was raped and gave birth to the child that was conceived during the rape, and then removed from the hospital by the authorities shortly after the babies birth, only to be stoned to death for the crime of adultery. And I worked with an Iranian man who had explained to me twenty years ago that an Iranian man was legally permitted to kill his wife for adultery (he doesn’t even have to prove that she is guilty. Suspicion alone is grounds enough). You, too, should be prepared before taking on this book.

And after reading it, you should be even more amazed at the strength of those middle-eastern women who have chosen to stand up and fight for their rights. I am in awe of the courage that it takes with the constant threat of death hanging over your head. I’ll never forget the Saudia Arabian woman who, when asked about how women were viewed in her country, said to the interviewer, “We are shoes. When a husband tires of his wife, he throws her away like an old pair of shoes. We are like shoes.” I think that this excerpt from Lori’s article about Iranian women says it best:

The Iranian woman is oppressed yet rebellious. She is subjugated yet unruly. She is controlled yet defiant. She is hushed and subservient. She is a religious fanatic living a secluded life. She is a revolutionary, a fighter, yet segregated and oppressed. Willing to die for her nation, she is a mother and a wife.

I think that Lori’s biggest hope is that young American girls and women will be aware of life in other countries, and enter them with full knowledge of the risks involved. Also that we will see outside of our own little worlds to understand what is going on in the rest of the world, and who these people really are that we share this planet with, and that you shouldn’t allow prejudice to cloud your opinion of a whole race of people based on the actions of a few.

You can learn more on the Lori’s Song  website.

Read Lori’s article about the Iranian Woman, available online at the Iran Politics Club.

Learn more about Lori’s Song or purchase the book through Outskirt Press.

Thanks again to Lori for offering to let me review her book, and for her gracious time in answering my seemingly endless questions. I only hope that I’ve done her story justice!

3 comments:

stacybuckeye said…

Outstanding interview and review. I’ve seen this book around, but wasn’t sure it was for me. After reading your review I think I need to give it a chance. Thanks 🙂

Anonymous said…

THIS IS A MUST READ BOOK and I don’t understand why it is NOT GETTING MORE RECOGNITION???

Cynthia said…

Cynthia
It’s hard enough to live threw it, then live in fear that someone is after you. To have the courage to write about it is a wonderful part of the healing process. Lori has come a long way in just the last year. I Know she will get threw this she is stronger than she thinks. Your interview was one of the first that didn’t make her feel like she had to defend herself God bless you.

To rehab or not!

Hi all!!

A very special friend of mine (I can’t say the name) is on their way to rehab today for a long stay at getting sober.  I can’t tell you how happy I am.  This person was highly addicted to narcotics (the stronger the better) and it ruined their family, almost to the point of no return.  This step, agreeing to go to rehab was a very hard decision for them.  I only wish this person the BEST LIFE HAS TO OFFER, and when you return you will have a loving supporting family to return to, and they will have saved your life, so be well, get well and get home and START LIFE!!! 🙂 🙂
The reason I’m posting this is I know all too well about being addicted.  I’ve been addicted to everything you can imagine, and if you’ve read my book you will know.  At one point I was taking 60 vicodin a day.  In 2008 I’m very happy to say I became clean in the SAME rehab facility my friend went to.
I can’t express enough that if you have an addiction, no MATTER WHAT IT IS, GET HELP.  Your family will be more supportive and loving if you “COME CLEAN” and tell them the truth.  People think they can keep using, or the next time they buy they will get it under a more controlled routine so they can start getting off whatever it is.  They think cutting back and slowly going off it will work.  IT DOES’NT!!!

I had been addicted to “SOMETHING” since I was 12yrs. old, I’m sure a lot of you my age know what “BLACK BEAUTIES” and “YELLOW JACKETS” are 🙂  Back then that was the drug of choice and it was REAL SPEED!  But then I graduated to other uppers then downers to counteract the uppers.  So I’m posting this in the hopes that if someone reads this it might NUDGE them or make them see themselves and go get HELP.
If you do you can always come to me for support.

I speak once a month at this rehab hospital on my book’s story (which involves my addiction throughout my life and how it contributed to me ending up in a POW camp in Iran right after 9/11).  And so many people come to me after the talk and are crying saying I changed their life and you have NO IDEA HOW GREAT THAT MAKES ME FEEL!!! The sales of my books in the gift shop doesn’t excite me, although the profits go to this rehab place.  What excites me is that maybe my story actually motivated someone who wasn’t 100% into getting clean to reach that level where they became that dedicated.  Speaking at that hospital (I don’t get paid I’m a volunteer) is one of the most cathartic times that I have when dealing with what happened to me in Iran.

Sorry so long, but in a synopsis GET HELP, GET CLEAN love yourself and love your family.   It couldn’t get any worse than it is for you right now at this moment if you decide to try this. The only way up is directly to rehab .
GOD BLESS! Lori

****PLEASE SHARE YOUR STORIES (IF YOUR COMFORTABLE DOING IT) WITH OUR READERS.  I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR HOW YOU HAVE DEALT WITH GETTING AND STAYING CLEAN.  DO YOU CONSTANTLY HAVE URGES OR HAS IT SUBSIDED, HOW LONG DID IT TAKE FOR THAT TO HAPPEN?  I WOULD APPRECIATE THOSE THAT ARE WILLING TO SHARE THEIR STORY AND IT MIGHT EVEN HELP ANOTHER MAKE A DECISION THAT WOULD ONLY IMPROVE THEIR LIFE!!!

 

My book “Lori’s Song” is available on Amazon:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/1432738291/?tag=viewbookat0e-20  

To LIVE or EXIST?

Today is one of those “BAD” days, where you have to force yourself out of bed, and look outside and say I’m lucky to be alive and with someone who loves me.  There was nothing special that happened to make me so apathetic or sad, just another day in the life of a bipolar, addict, PTSD survivor and sexual abuse survivor.  I think having one of these is bad enough and GOD I can empathize with your moods, but I think the reigning disorder that makes me feel like I do today is called BIPOLAR.

Now I’m not sure if adding all of the above with the bipolar does anymore to me or less, but I know my bipolar has changed since I was younger.  When I was younger and went on manic episodes I was creative, proud, confident and got things accomplished *just in a lot shorter time period:).  But now all I get is “she’s manic again”.  No one lets me express me or let me bask in the moment of confidence and wanting to accomplish the world, instead it’s a BAD THING to be manic.  I’m sure there are bad episodes of being manic, but I’m sure there are GOOD PRODUCTIVE ONES too.  The medication that were on doesn’t really help either.  It helps those around us (because were apathetic and don’t make their lives anymore confusing) but for us it is like the loss of “LIFE”.  I don’t mind being stable and I’m pretty sure I don’t get out of control like I used to, but I still enjoy my manic days, and no one can understand that.  I’m writing this to get YOUR INPUT on how you view your bipolar.

Now on to substance abuse.  I speak now at a rehab facility, and one thing I say (WHICH IS MY BELIEF) if you don’t have anyone to get clean for then your not going to get clean.  I know they preach about doing it for “YOURSELF” but I still say unless you have a motivating factor that bugs your conscience about not wanting to do drugs anymore than I don’t think you’d get clean.  If I were alone and had no one that loved me, I would have never went to rehab, I probably would have done MORE DRUGS!   When you finally find a reason to live albeit health recovery or someone you meet then you have a DESIRE to quit and seek out that new life with the person you love.  Now don’t get me wrong and think I mean you have to have a “LOVER” or B/F or G/F, I mean anyone that cares about you and wants you clean to the point that you finally get tired of seeing that person hurt.  It could be a child, a spouse or mother or BFF, hell it could be your pet.

Now on to the cravings, I’m on this drug called SUBOXONE, and I’m taking 4 8mg/2mg tabs a day, this is NOT what people normally take.  They usually are weaned off this drug before leaving the clinic.  But since I’ve been severely injured in IRAN, and suffer from so many pain issues they decided to keep me on this dose, so I wouldn’t go back to pain pills.  Virtually I gave up one addiction for another, since these pills are narcotics.  They are also supposed to help you not crave ANYTHING you have abused in your past.   BS, every time I see a movie where someone is doing coke, I get such an urge it isn’t funny.  The only difference now is I DON’T GIVE IN TO MY CRAVINGS, although sometimes I do try to do a logic summation of IF I did give in, how would this not hurt me.

Now onto PTSD, where no one understands how noises, smells, or certain situations can leave you feeling nervous or even worse make you feel like your going to die in that moment, because you feel like you’ve been there before.  Well you have been there before they are called flashbacks, and anything can trigger them, a loud noise a TV show like Law  & Order SVU (rapes), a certain smell, (these happen to me a lot) but it’s really like your back to that moment in time which was your HELL ON EARTH.  People don’t get it or they think were faking it for attention, I just want to make people aware that these things are VERY REAL, and the best thing to deal with them is a loving supportive friend or pet.

In a synopsis I just wanted to point out how I feel during these and because of these events and WELCOME YOUR INPUT on how you deal with life under the circumstances of one of these disorders.  Your INPUT will not only help me it could help others realize different ways to deal with them.  PLEASE COMMENT!!!

Also I feel better now that I’ve written this and vented a little. And remember we have TWO CHOICES IN LIFE, to LIVE it or just EXIST in it, you decide, God Bless.

Bipolars and their MEDICATION. PLEASE READ THIS!

 

If there is one thing that I want to stress to people with BIPOLAR is:

Please remember to TAKE YOUR MEDS!!   I didn’t really realize how MUCH they made a difference until I was videotaped one time, and my GOD I looked and acted like a completely different person.

I was way too hyper and sensitive, and a little paranoid. I always think that I’m not good enough for anyone (especially after 911). After what was done to me, I couldn’t look people in the eye. It was so hard to believe that anyone would find anything interesting enough in me to want to be my friend. …UNLESS..they WANTED SOMETHING. It seems like being bipolar either leaves you in a total state of despair and insecurity and skeptical if anyone wants to do something for you…or WITH YOU (*friends e.g going out together)   or it gives you so much self esteem and confidence that it borders on the narcissitic mode.

Sadly neither last for any length  of time.   I think that is why I wouldn’t take my meds, I liked those times of being so confident and arrogant and felt tlike I could conquer the world, and I would conquer a lot of things, but usually turned out bad in the end, but at the time it was happening I felt like this superior being….like no one knows what I’m thinking and that I could covince someone to do anything. And usually when someone has that much confidence it produces an energy so strong that others feel it and you do end up getting away with a lot…take for example the movie “CATCH ME IF YOU CAN”. But as usual just like in the movie the Bipolar didn’t get the girl and live happily ever after, they usually get involved with the criminal justice system and is put in prison or other.

Most Bipolars are HIGHLY INTELLIGENT, they theorize that this is based upon how the neurons fire into certain synapses of the brain, and the ones they touch are the ones responsible for intelligence and creative thinking. But who knows someone else will come out with a DIFFERNT THEORY later they always do!

If they could only bottle the effects/affects that mania gives us,  and then only the GOOD CREATIVITY, then we would have some pretty brilliant people out there.

But overall  trust me, stay on your meds to stay STABLE & CONSISTENT…well as consistent as you CAN BE.  Be blessed with who is around you and willing to go through this with you. Remember people we are geniuses so we have to stay calm to put up with the other people of this world:):):):)

I would also like to share a website that also deals with bipolar, it is humoruos, touching, and well done.   https://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Life-With-A-Side-Of-Bipolar/333331666761680

Please if your bipolar SHARE YOUR STORY WITH US, we need COMRADES. or if you have PTSD, have experienced DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, SUBSTANCE ABUSE, or ever been on the drug SUBOXONE for substance abuse.  We have categories for all these AILMENTS🙂    Or if you’d just like to vent about anything we welcome that too:)

 

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Blogging 2012

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SO TRUE!!!!

 

This has been the first truly active, successful blogging that I’ve ever done.  I have met some pretty extrordinary people, matter of fact they all are extrordinary!  Not only have the people I’ve met had their own downfalls and disasters in life, they have survived, and have made their life better despite it.

Sometimes in life we have to be slapped in the face before we realize just how lucky we are in life.  Materialism is the way of society today as is technological toys that take our minds off of reality.  But along with that passage of reality we fail to meet people that could influence or change our lives in a more “REAL” fashion.

While I begrudge the technology that is forcing us into “BOT reality, where communication is no longer face to face, and we never have to deal with rejection due to just tapping a button if we don’t want to continue reading what we think is “bad news”.

I believe insecurity is what feeds this type of communication.  We no longer have to fear the thought that someone might not want to talk to us, or like us so we just delete them from a list and put them on another “LIST”.  We become so absorbed with this cyber world that it is turning our lives into one anti-social desert of lonliness.  Sure we can maintain our confidence that we are popular by keeping those like us and that LIKE US on a networking site, but we are failing at human interaction.   Even bullying has become a cyber sport.

I really feel sorry for the kids that won’t be able to go to school football games and “INTERACT, or go on hayrides during Halloween, or sledding during winter.  We DONT do that anymore, instead we are running into telephone polls and falling into manholes because were not watching where we are going, all the while texting our friend who is walking behind us.  Growing up is no longer the same, and being a kid is no longer the same.  Sad but true so we have to deal with it.

BUTTTTT the one thing I can say for sure that is positive out of all of this is meeting my fellow bloggers and AUTHORS.  To be allowed to talk to people from different points in the country and be able to share with each other lifes ups and downs all the while trying to tell stories that we hope will inspire, teach and touch others emotions is a WONDERFUL thing.

I get confused with all these blogging awards and their stipulations about posting this sentence and sharing this link while answering this question to accept it.  I’m not saying thats a bad thing because everyone involved should get recognition.  But please don’t fault me if I don’t respond appropriately or thank the wrong person, or even moreso don’t thank the right person.  Therefor I would just like to award one big

THANK YOU FELLOW BLOGGERS AND AUTHORS for a great year 2012!!!!

I hope everyone gets a chance to visit and interact with the women I’ve met since blogging.  They are truly INSPIRATIONAL, KIND and PATIENT women.  Sadly you won’t be able to meet one of them, for she passed away in a house fire with her husband in 2012.   But she does deserve recognition   Sandra McLeod Humphrey who was very prolific in writing childrens books.  She will be sadly missed in the literary world and amongst her friends and colleagues.      As for the rest of these fine women I will list their sites below and be sure to visit these site, I’m sure you will laugh, cry and recognize why these women are so special.  But always remember……

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Once more THANK YOU ALL FELLOW BLOGGERS who have allowed me into your circle and have accepted me as your FRIEND!  Salut to 2013

Rosemary Adkins  http://www.extraordinaryireland.com/  be sure to buy the book and aid in the continued research on diabetes.

Micki Peluso http://www.mallie1025.blogspot.com/

Sharla Shults http://catnipoflife.wordpress.com/  and http://www.awakenings2012.blogspot.com/

Christine Hannon  http://ahairdressersdiaries.wordpress.com/

Delinda McCann http://delindalmccann.weebly.com/blog.html

Deirdre Tolhurst  http://www.deirdretolhurst.blogspot.com/

Raani York  http://raaniyork.wordpress.com/

Sylvia Massara   http://www.sylviamassara.com/

Posthumously Sandra McLeod Humphrey http://kidscandoit.com

Sandy Nachlinger & Sandra Allen   http://iousex.blogspot.com/

Lisa Fender  http://www.lisafender.com/

Manic Jenn  http://moodswingsnjmadness.wordpress.com/about/

Jessie Tyson  http://jessiebtyson.blogspot.ca/

Linnieann  http://linneann.wordpress.com/

and my own hometown writers group

Autumn  http://www.thelostwordwriters.com/blog/

Thank you all, you couldn’t have been kinder and more accepting of a group.  Lori

Teaser Tuesday

Basically, you post a 2-sentence excerpt from a book on your own blog, just as I did on mine. Then you go to http://shouldbereading.wordpress.com and comment on the Teaser Tuesday post there, and include the link to your blog post in your comment. Other people who comment will go to your blog and leave comments there, and you’ll visit their blogs too. There are over 100 comments on the Should Be Reading post today.
Basically, this introduces readers to various books and drives readers to your blog, increasing your SEO (search engine optimization).

MY POST:

That night when the guards were smoking their opium and laughing, I tried to ask Faresh what she missed most about home.

Her reply was, “You must never think about home, you must think about this, this is your life now.”

From: “Lori’s Song” by Lori Foroozandeh

Amazon link: Available on KINDLE, Paperback and Hardcover.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/1432738291/?tag=losso-20&camp=14573&creative=327641&linkCode=as1&creativeASIN=1432738291&adid=0KESH5SQTHNBG1SRQGY4&&ref-refURL=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.loris-song.com%2F

More information on PTSD.

What is PTSD??

Posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is an emotional illness that develops as a result of a terribly frightening, life-threatening, or otherwise highly unsafe experience. PTSD sufferers re-experience the traumatic event or events in some way, tend to avoid places, people, or other things that remind them of the event (avoidance), and are exquisitely sensitive to normal life experiences (hyperarousal). Although this condition has likely existed since human beings have endured trauma, PTSD has only been recognized as a formal diagnosis since 1980. However, it was called by different names as early as the American Civil War, when combat veterans were referred to as suffering from “soldier’s heart.” In World War I, symptoms that were generally consistent with PTSD were referred to as “combat fatigue.” Soldiers who developed such symptoms in World War II were said to be suffering from “gross stress reaction,” and many who fought in Vietnam who had symptoms of what is now called PTSD were assessed as having “post-Vietnam syndrome.” PTSD has also been called “battle fatigue” and “shell shock.” Complex posttraumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD) usually results from prolonged exposure to a traumatic event or series thereof and is characterized by long-lasting problems with many aspects of emotional and social functioning.

Approximately 7%-8% of people in the United States will likely develop PTSD in their lifetime, with the lifetime occurrence (prevalence) in combat veterans and rape victims ranging from 10% to as high as 30%. Somewhat higher rates of this disorder have been found to occur in African Americans, Hispanics, and Native Americans compared to Caucasians in the United States. Some of that difference is thought to be due to higher rates of dissociation soon before and after the traumatic event (peritraumatic); a tendency for individuals from minority ethnic groups to blame themselves, have less social support, and an increased perception of racism for those ethnic groups; as well as differences between how ethnic groups may express distress. Other important facts about PTSD include the estimate of 5 million people who suffer from PTSD at any one time in the United States and the fact that women are twice as likely to develop PTSD as men

Almost half of individuals who use outpatient mental-health services have been found to suffer from PTSD. As evidenced by the occurrence of stress in many individuals in the United States in the days following the 2001 terrorist attacks, not being physically present at a traumatic event does not guarantee that one cannot suffer from traumatic stress that can lead to the development of PTSD

PTSD statistics in children and teens reveal that up to more than 40% have endured at least one traumatic event, resulting in the development of PTSD in up to 15% of girls and 6% of boys. On average, 3%-6% of high school students in the United States and as many as 30%-60% of children who have survived specific disasters have PTSD. Up to 100% of children who have seen a parent killed or endured sexual assault or abuse tend to develop PTSD, and more than one-third of youths who are exposed to community violence will suffer from the disorder.

AUTHORS NOTE:

I suffer from PTSD, I was in a POW type camp in Iran for 6 weeks. I went to Iran in 1998 with my Iranian husband and once there he refused to let me come home to the USA. The day after 9-11, anyone with TIES to Americans; that is friends or family were put into these camps, and were beat and raped. After I escaped I was flown to the American embassy in Dubai, UAE, since there is no American embassy in Iran. I walked off the plane into Detroit metro airport weighing 70 pounds and missing most of my teeth and had many closed head injuries. I have published a book and have a website dedicated to cause of womens rights in these countries…the reasoning behind this is included in my online version of my book at:

http://www.loris-song.com/

I hope you this information helps!

“Lori’s Song” on E-Book

I just would like everyone to know that my book “Lori’s Song” is available on E-Book as well as Kindle, Paperback, and Hardcover.  This is my authors page with the available links

http://www.outskirtspress.com/lorissong/

I also have a YOUTUBE video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j85rYnZ4YYU

This is my link to my Bronze Readers Favorite Award:

http://readersfavorite.com/review/2542

If there are ANY questions you have regarding the book, obtaining it or other please contact me and put LORIS SONG in the subject line.  lori@loris-song.com

Thanks all, I appreciate your support more than I can express in words.

The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone else believes in him and is willing to trust him.
Ralph Waldo Emerson