Blogging 2012

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SO TRUE!!!!

 

This has been the first truly active, successful blogging that I’ve ever done.  I have met some pretty extrordinary people, matter of fact they all are extrordinary!  Not only have the people I’ve met had their own downfalls and disasters in life, they have survived, and have made their life better despite it.

Sometimes in life we have to be slapped in the face before we realize just how lucky we are in life.  Materialism is the way of society today as is technological toys that take our minds off of reality.  But along with that passage of reality we fail to meet people that could influence or change our lives in a more “REAL” fashion.

While I begrudge the technology that is forcing us into “BOT reality, where communication is no longer face to face, and we never have to deal with rejection due to just tapping a button if we don’t want to continue reading what we think is “bad news”.

I believe insecurity is what feeds this type of communication.  We no longer have to fear the thought that someone might not want to talk to us, or like us so we just delete them from a list and put them on another “LIST”.  We become so absorbed with this cyber world that it is turning our lives into one anti-social desert of lonliness.  Sure we can maintain our confidence that we are popular by keeping those like us and that LIKE US on a networking site, but we are failing at human interaction.   Even bullying has become a cyber sport.

I really feel sorry for the kids that won’t be able to go to school football games and “INTERACT, or go on hayrides during Halloween, or sledding during winter.  We DONT do that anymore, instead we are running into telephone polls and falling into manholes because were not watching where we are going, all the while texting our friend who is walking behind us.  Growing up is no longer the same, and being a kid is no longer the same.  Sad but true so we have to deal with it.

BUTTTTT the one thing I can say for sure that is positive out of all of this is meeting my fellow bloggers and AUTHORS.  To be allowed to talk to people from different points in the country and be able to share with each other lifes ups and downs all the while trying to tell stories that we hope will inspire, teach and touch others emotions is a WONDERFUL thing.

I get confused with all these blogging awards and their stipulations about posting this sentence and sharing this link while answering this question to accept it.  I’m not saying thats a bad thing because everyone involved should get recognition.  But please don’t fault me if I don’t respond appropriately or thank the wrong person, or even moreso don’t thank the right person.  Therefor I would just like to award one big

THANK YOU FELLOW BLOGGERS AND AUTHORS for a great year 2012!!!!

I hope everyone gets a chance to visit and interact with the women I’ve met since blogging.  They are truly INSPIRATIONAL, KIND and PATIENT women.  Sadly you won’t be able to meet one of them, for she passed away in a house fire with her husband in 2012.   But she does deserve recognition   Sandra McLeod Humphrey who was very prolific in writing childrens books.  She will be sadly missed in the literary world and amongst her friends and colleagues.      As for the rest of these fine women I will list their sites below and be sure to visit these site, I’m sure you will laugh, cry and recognize why these women are so special.  But always remember……

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Once more THANK YOU ALL FELLOW BLOGGERS who have allowed me into your circle and have accepted me as your FRIEND!  Salut to 2013

Rosemary Adkins  http://www.extraordinaryireland.com/  be sure to buy the book and aid in the continued research on diabetes.

Micki Peluso http://www.mallie1025.blogspot.com/

Sharla Shults http://catnipoflife.wordpress.com/  and http://www.awakenings2012.blogspot.com/

Christine Hannon  http://ahairdressersdiaries.wordpress.com/

Delinda McCann http://delindalmccann.weebly.com/blog.html

Deirdre Tolhurst  http://www.deirdretolhurst.blogspot.com/

Raani York  http://raaniyork.wordpress.com/

Sylvia Massara   http://www.sylviamassara.com/

Posthumously Sandra McLeod Humphrey http://kidscandoit.com

Sandy Nachlinger & Sandra Allen   http://iousex.blogspot.com/

Lisa Fender  http://www.lisafender.com/

Manic Jenn  http://moodswingsnjmadness.wordpress.com/about/

Jessie Tyson  http://jessiebtyson.blogspot.ca/

Linnieann  http://linneann.wordpress.com/

and my own hometown writers group

Autumn  http://www.thelostwordwriters.com/blog/

Thank you all, you couldn’t have been kinder and more accepting of a group.  Lori

The beginning of my demise-Childhood sexual abuse

At age 11 I was molested by my adoptive brother.  I was adopted into this family when I was 6 months old due to being severely abused by my biological family.  When my adopted family got me I had cigarette burns all over my body and severe bed sores on my bottom from not having my diaper changed.  The adoptive family was wonderful until about age 10-11.  That is when my brother who was 18 at the time started playing this “tickle” game.

It started out with; “you tickle my foot and then I will yours-while we were watching TV”.  Then it escalated to him coming into my bedroom and wanting me to tickle something else.  Needless to say when this started I was scared to death to be left alone with him in the house.  I can’t believe my mom didn’t know what was going on, since everytime she left me with my sisters and brother to babysit, I would scream and once banged on the screen door so hard I broke the glass in it and cut my hand all up.

I tried to tell her a few times but she “didn’t have time to talk”.  She also favored my brother, he couldn’t do NO WRONG!  When things started happening like my brother killing my pet rabbit in front of me by hitting it on the head while he hung it upside down, to stunts like asking me to hold onto the battery cables on his motorcycle when he tried to jump start it thus ending in me getting a shock, while my mother stood at the door and watched and laughed.  That is when I realized she MUST HAVE known what was going on.

I started thinking this is what is normal in a household like this, he kept justifying it because we weren’t technically blood relatives.  I knew in my mind it couldn’t be right but I had to justify it as normal until I could do something about it.

At age 15 I emancipated myself by getting married to a 23 year old to escape the house and the abuse from my brother.

Later on in life I thought I had overcome the abuse and that I was strong and could live with it, but now that I’m 46 and have had LOTS of counseling, I’ve come to realize that the abuse had set boundaries and limitations in all future relationships.  Every relationship I had after that I felt like their was ALWAYS a motivation behind sex, even when it was with someone who loved you TOTALLY.  When I met John he thought I was crazy with all my mistrust issues in our relationship.  Well technically I am crazy I have bipolar:):)

He went through therapy with me and still is, to try and get over these thoughts I have about relationships.  Alot of the events my brother put me through and not just the sexual abuse but the cruel acts he would do like kill my pet rabbit and then we would eat it for dinner left the thought of being with a man just sickening.  So I entered relationships which I endured even if they were dysfunctional.  I was married and physically abused but stayed because in my mind if a man does something bad to you, it’s only to show how much he loves you, and after all he did apologize and act affectionate afterwards.  And that craving you have for affection after being beat excuses all past behavior.

Then I married an Iranain who virtually “own” their women.  I was sold in Iran for drug debts, I had moved to Iran only to find out you need your husbands written permission to leave the country.  This is why I wrote a book, not only for a catharsis but to inform others that they are not alone in their “screwed up” thinking and possibly making them realize WHY they have that thinking.  I can’t solve anyone’s problems but I can share and hope that my story might be familiar with another persons to the point that they realize the relationship they are in or were in wasn’t normal and to get OUT.

I’ve added some resourceful links on childhood sexual abuse.  Hopefully these might provide some help and prevention signs to not only recognize abuse but prevent it as well.

I wish you all well in your journey to recovery.  Myself I will never see myself as cured, because the act was committed, but what I will see myself is as HEALING and continue to see that what happened wasn’t my fault or RIGHT!  Thank you and God Bless.

http://www.pandys.org/articles/oldersurvivorsofchildsexualassault.html

http://www.wiit.com/guided_tour.htm

http://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/factsheets/signs.cfm

http://www.d2l.org/site/c.4dICIJOkGcISE/b.6035035/k.8258/Prevent_Child_Sexual_Abuse.htm

http://findatherapist.wordpress.com/2010/01/15/recognizing-child-sexual-predators-protecting-your-children/