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Holidays & Observances which include etiquette tips.

Memorial Day

“Our debt to the heroic men and valiant women in the service of our country can never be repaid. They have earned our undying gratitude. America will never forget their sacrifices.” — Harry S. Truman

This is a little history and traditions, and some Least Known Facts that all will prove interesting.

I personally rever any man or woman who enlists his/her services to guard our country and knowing what the COST IS, yet they still sacrifice their lives to allow us to live with Freedom & Democracy in OUR COUNTRY THE USA!!

Memorial Day is an American holiday, observed on the last Monday of May, honoring the men and women who died while serving in the U.S. military. Memorial Day 2024 will occur on Monday, May 27.

For many people, it also means they have an extra day off to spend time with their families and visit graves of family members and friends who have passed fighting to keep our freedoms in the USA!!!

Established more than 150 years ago, Memorial Day is intended to honor and remember U.S. military personnel lost in war and is often commemorated with parades and special services.Originally known as Decoration Day, it originated in the years following the Civil War and became an official federal holiday in 1971. Many Americans observe Memorial Day by visiting cemeteries or memorials, holding family gatherings and participating in parades. Unofficially, it marks the beginning of the summer season.

Here are some things you should NOT DO on Memorial Day:

  • DON’T WISH ANYONE A “HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY” …
  • Do not thank current service member. …
  • Do not forget about the purpose of the holiday. …
  • DON’T DISREGARD ITS IMPORTANCE. …
  • DON’T FORGET IT EXISTS. …
  • DON’T LET POLITICS KEEP YOU FROM RENDERING RESPECT.

One item on “What you should not do on Memorial Day” was to NOT THANK A SERVICE MEMBER FOR THEIR SERVICE;

THIS WAS NEWS TO ME. For some reason I thought this day and Veterans Day were two holidays you should emphasize this behavior. But I guess I was ignorant as to why you shouldn’t do this. So I googled it and this is what I found. After reading this it made perfectly good sense. I’m glad I post on and about certain holidays and dates throughout the year, because I learn a LOT! Please see below:

**** America’s veterans are honored during November on Veteran’s Day when we aim to remember and appreciate the sacrifices of all veterans. But, Memorial Day allows the country to focus on those service members who are no longer with us – an important distinction.

Why can’t you wear white on Memorial Day?

By the 1950s, women’s magazines started making this “no white after Labor Day” rule more public. Wearing white only between Memorial Day and Labor Day now signified that a lady was part of the in-the-know fashion club.

What is FLAG etiquette for Memorial Day?

On Memorial Day the flag is displayed at half-staff until noon and then raised to full-staff until sunset. On land a flag is flown from a staff (pole); at sea a flag is flown from a ship’s mast. So, correctly, a flag is at “half-mast” at sea and “half-staff” on land.

What are you supposed to do at 3pm on Memorial Day?

The National Moment of Remembrance, established by Congress, asks Americans wherever they are at 3 p.m., local time, on Memorial Day to pause in an act of national unity (duration: one minute). The time 3 p.m. was chosen because it is the time when most Americans are enjoying their freedoms on the national holiday.

****THINGS YOU SHOULD/CAN DO ON MEMORIAL DAY.

-Flying the U.S. Flag at half-staff until noon. Memorial Day is a day of “National Mourning.”

-Attending religious services of your choice.-Visiting memorials.

-Participating in a National Moment of Remembrance” at 3:00 PM local time, to pause and think upon the meaning of the day and for taps to be played where possible.

I derived these tidbits for you in a way that I would hope makes it for easy and entertaining reading. BUTTT before I go I have one last bit of information that I really enjoyed. Well peeps I hope you enjoyed this potpourri of information regarding Memorial Day. Not only do I love doing these articles, I also learn so much. But if I’ve been reiterating TOOO much just leave a comment. I’d also like to READ COMMENTS (good or bad) and on your likes or dislikes from anything to everything.

Thank you, and to all a GOOD NIGHT!

The traditional colors associated with Memorial Day are RED, WHITE and BLUEwhich are the colors of the American flag:

  • Red– Represents the poppy flower, which has been linked to the holiday since World War I. Poppies symbolize hope, rebirth, and resilience, and can also represent the bloodshed and valor of fallen soldiers. The Veterans of Foreign Wars (VFW) sells red Buddy Poppies on Memorial Day, and artificial red poppies are sold to raise money for veterans.
  • White-Represents purity, innocence, wisdom, and honesty. It can also symbolize the selflessness of those who died in service to their country.
  • Blue-Represents regality, trustworthiness, earnestness, and integrity. It can also signify loyalty, reverence, and the unity of the American people ***PLEASE NOTE TO PUSH THE PAGE BUTTONS BELOW TO CONTINUE ONTO THE NEXT HOLIDAY TY. LORI

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VETERANS DAY: A Day to honor ALL Service members and their Families.

GREAT RESOURCES FOR VETS THROUGHOUT AND AT END OF THIS POST

 / LORI

Image result for veterans day quotes
 Every November 11, patriotic Americans set aside time to honor military veterans, both alive and passed, and thank and remember them for their service. Today we call this special day Veterans Day. But it wasn’t always called that. In fact, it wasn’t even a national holiday for a long time.
Originally called Armistice Day, the holiday commemorated the end of World War I on November 11, 1918, when fighting ceased in what was at the time shortsightedly called The War to End All Wars. (Nobody knew that 20 years later the world would fight again.) Seven months after the cease-fire armistice was signed, the Treaty of Versailles was signed on June 28, 1919, officially ending the war between Germany and the Allied and Associated Powers.
Immediately after the war ended, grateful citizens and veteran groups started lobbying for official recognition of the war’s end with a national holiday. By 1938, 27 states had made November 11 a legal holiday in commemoration, so on May 13, Congress made it a federal holiday by passing legislation that declared November 11 “dedicated to the cause of world peace and to be hereafter celebrated and known as ‘Armistice Day.’”
By the time World War II ended, over 16 million veterans had served, and by the end of the Korean War, 5.7 million more were added to the rolls. After extensive lobbying by veteran groups and service organizations, Congress amended the law in 1954 to remove “Armistice” and replace it with the broader-reaching term “Veterans” to honor all who had served.
But then it got confusing. In 1968, Congress passed the Uniform Monday Holiday Bill, which moved four federal holidays – Washington’s Birthday, Memorial Day, Veterans Day, and Columbus Day – to Mondays instead of a certain date. The new law took effect January 1, 1971 and made the first Veterans Day under the new law fall on October 25. When President Gerald Ford, a Navy veteran, took office in 1973, he recognized the significance November 11 held in American history and urged Congress to reverse the Uniform Monday Holiday Bill, which it did in 1975.
Today, thanks to United States Senate Resolution 143, which passed on August 4, 2001, Veterans Day is the beginning of National Veterans Awareness Week, which run November 11-17 for the purpose of educating elementary and secondary school children on the sacrifices and contributions of veterans.
As we celebrate Veterans Day this November 11, let us remember the sacrifices of those who currently serve and those who have served in the past. Thank one of the over 21 million veterans currently living in the United States. Shake a hand. Tell them how grateful you are. Most of all, remember what they have done to protect and preserve this country.

LET US NOT FORGET THOSE RETURNING HOME!


Too often we forget about our Veterans when they return home. Some become homeless and many business' won't hire vets because they are afraid of the implications and problems that might come with the vet...e.g PTSD episodes, flashbacks, health problems, and many others.
There are programs to help vets but a lot of them fall through the cracks and are told there is nothing that can be done.
Others don't want to socialize, after what they've been through I'm sure it's hard to even trust a human being again.
And let us talk about the VA:

But I would like to provide some links that might help.

The link below will tell you how to apply for healthcare benefits.
https://www.va.gov/health-care/how-to-apply/

BELOW IS A LINK TO HELP HOMELESS VETERANS

https://www.va.gov/HOMELESS/for_homeless_veterans.asp
The Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) is the only federal agency that provides substantial hands-on assistance directly to homeless people. Last year, VA provided health care services to more than 100,000 homeless veterans and provided services to 70,000 veterans in its specialized homeless programs.

https://www.military.com/benefits/veteran-benefits/homeless-veterans-programs.html

I also have a website with a RESOURCE page for veterans
www.loris-song.com

RESOURCE LINKS:
Below are some resource links for PTSD

Veterans Guide to a Peaceful Home Atmosphere

Trauma & PTSD in TEENS-Signs, Symptoms, Treatment

Recognizing TRIGGERS in PTSD


PTSD in the Workplace

12 Surprising Remedies for PTSD

Resources for Veterans- Housing, Education, Healthcare, Financing Options, Compensation you
might not know about

Mentally Fit- A blog where people can share, learn and educate one another in a safe setting

I put together this article back in 2019 but I will continue to post it every year and keep adding resources for the VETS AND THOSE NEEDING RESOURCES FOR PTSD.

I know all too well about PTSD! I suffer from it due to being in a POW-Prisoner of War type camp for 6 weeks in IRAN during 9/11. If your interested in my book you can click the link below. But this blog isn’t for PROMOTING my BOOK, it is for resources for those that suffer from conditions listed on the home page. And I PROMISE YOU as soon as I get any special updates or resource links i will post them right away!

Lori’s Song- Amazon link

cover2

PTSD- Your not alone!

 

Posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can occur after you have been through a traumatic event. A traumatic event is something terrible and scary that you see, or that happens to you, like:

  • Combat exposure
  • Child sexual or physical abuse
  • Terrorist attack
  • Sexual or physical assault
  • Serious accidents, like a car wreck
  • Natural disasters, like a fire, tornado, hurricane, flood, or earthquake

During a traumatic event, you think that your life or others’ lives are in danger. You may feel afraid or feel that you have no control over what is happening around you. Most people have some stress-related reactions after a traumatic event; but, not everyone gets PTSD. If your reactions don’t go away over time and they disrupt your life, you may have PTSD.

My experience was, FLASHBACKS.

You also have something called “FLASHBACKS”.  These are what I suffered from in addition to the above symptoms.  When I returned from Iran and the torture I suffered there, I started having what were called “non-epileptic” seizures.  These are real seizures but can not be traced to epilepsy as the cause.  I also had flashbacks, and when I suffered from these I would all of a sudden just leave this world and return to the location where I suffered all the pain and torture.  I would either see something that reminded me of that place or etal.  Then I would either try to start physically hitting myself or banging my head against the wall or floor, I would talk in farsi (the language of Iran).  I would push people away from me because I was afraid they were coming to rape me.  This is a horrible mental disorder that is suffered by many people with trauma in their life.  Veterans are also a big population that suffers from it.

How does PTSD develop?

Most people who go through a trauma have some symptoms at the beginning. Only some will develop PTSD over time. It isn’t clear why some people develop PTSD and others don’t.

Whether or not you get PTSD depends on many things:

  • How intense the trauma was or how long it lasted
  • If you were injured or lost someone important to you
  • How close you were to the event
  • How strong your reaction was
  • How much you felt in control of events
  • How much help and support you got after the event

What are the symptoms of PTSD?

PTSD symptoms usually start soon after the traumatic event, but they may not appear until months or years later. They also may come and go over many years. If the symptoms last longer than 4 weeks, cause you great distress, or interfere with your work or home life, you might have PTSD.

There are four types of symptoms of PTSD

  1. Reliving the event (also called re-experiencing symptoms)

You may have bad memories or nightmares. You even may feel like you’re going through the event again. This is called a flashback.

2.  Avoiding situations that remind you of the event

You may try to avoid situations or people that trigger memories of the traumatic event. You may even avoid talking or thinking about the event.

3.  Feeling numb

You may find it hard to express your feelings. Or, you may not be interested in activities you used to enjoy. This is another way to avoid memories.

4.  Feeling keyed up (also called hyperarousal)

You may be jittery, or always alert and on the lookout for danger. This is known as hyperarousal.

I suffered from all of the above but at different times.  My main symptoms or events were feeling keyed up, and feeling numb.  Unlike the above I would purposely NOT avoid stressful situations because I thought I HAD TO GET ON WITH REAL LIFE, so if I avoided every stressful situation then I wouldn’t be able to function.  This included watching TV shows like Law & Order SVU, which dealt with a lot of rapes and childhood sexual abuse *both of which I’ve suffered from.  I can’t say these shows don’t affect me because they do at times, and I have to quit watching, but I think (my own opinion not professional) that if I keep dealing with life on it’s terms then it will all work out in the end.

Plus I have a WONDERFUL SUPPORTIVE MAN who has given and put up with so much of my downfalls and also the accomplishments that makes me blessed to have him in my life.

What other problems do people with PTSD experience?

People with PTSD may also have other problems. These include:

  • Feelings of hopelessness, shame, or despair
  • Depression or anxiety
  • Drinking or drug problems
  • Physical symptoms or chronic pain
  • Employment problems
  • Relationship problems, including divorce

In many cases, treatments for PTSD will also help these other problems, because they are often related. The coping skills you learn in treatment can work for PTSD and these related problems.

Needless to say I’ve suffered from all the above, but counseling and the right doctors can help you TREMENDOUSLY.  Most of the above symptoms are now under control to a level that I can function in HIGH capacity.  (Not HIGH to mean on drugs:))

What treatments are available?

When you have PTSD, dealing with the past can be hard. Instead of telling others how you feel, you may keep your feelings bottled up. But treatment can help you get better. There are two main types of treatment, psychotherapy (sometimes called counseling) and medication. Sometimes people combine psychotherapy and medication.  I personally don’t advocate some of the treatments below, while I don’t believe medication should be a cure all either, I believe a MD, and a therapist who has a LOT of experience with PTSD patients are your best bet.  But again these are my opinions.

Psychotherapy for PTSD

Psychotherapy, or counseling, involves meeting with a therapist. There are different types of psychotherapy:

  • Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is the most effective treatment for PTSD.  There are different types of CBT. such as cognitive therapy and exposure therapy.
    • One type is Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT) where you learn skills to understand how trauma changed your thoughts and feelings.
    • Another type is Prolonged Exposure (PE) therapy where you talk about your trauma repeatedly until memories are no longer upsetting. You also go to places that are safe, but that you have been staying away from because they are related to the trauma.
  • A similar kind of therapy is called eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR). This therapy involves focusing on sounds or hand movements while you talk about the trauma.
  • Medications for PTSD

    Medications can be effective too. A type of drug known as a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI), which is also used for depression, is effective for PTSD. Another medication called Prazosin has been found to be helpful in decreasing nightmares related to the trauma.

    IMPORTANT: Benzodiazepines and atypical antipsychotics should generally be avoided for PTSD treatment because they do not treat the core PTSD symptoms.

Where to Get Help for PTSD

 Are you are in crisis? You have options:

  • Call 911
  • Go to the nearest Emergency Room
  • Call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255
  • Contact the Veterans Crisis Line: 1-800-273-8255, press 1 (text 838255) or Confidential Veterans Chat with a counselor   To have a private chat with a veterans counselor who has experience with PTSD go to the link below.

http://www.veteranscrisisline.net/ChatTermsOfService.aspx?account=Veterans%20Chat/

  • National Institute of Mental Health’s Anxiety HOTLINE 1-888-826-9438
  •  Online support forum:    http://www.findthelight.net/forum/login.asp 
  •   National Center for PTSD – The National Center for Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) conduct cutting edge research and apply resultant findings to: “Advance the Science and Promote Understanding of Traumatic Stress.” Fact sheets, videos, and more about trauma to help answer your questions about PTSD and related issues.
    www.ncptsd.va.gov
  • National Resource Directory – The National Resource Directory (NRD) provides access to services and resources at the national, state and local levels that support recovery, rehabilitation and community reintegration. www.nationalresourcedirectory.gov
  • The National Domestic Violence Hotline – The hotline is staffed 24 hours a day by trained counselors who can provide crisis assistance and information about shelters, legal advocacy, health care centers and counseling. There is also a toll-free number for the hearing impaired, 1-800-787-3224
    www.thehotline.org
    1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
  • The National Sexual Assault Hotline – Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN)
    www.rainn.org
    1-800-656-HOPE This number will direct callers to a local rape crisis center
  • National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence Hotline
    www.ncadd.com
    1-800-622-2255
  • SAMHSA – works to improve the quality and availability of substance abuse prevention, alcohol and drug addiction treatment, and mental health services.
    www.samhsa.gov
    1-800-662-HELP (4357)

I’ve tried not only to include the numbers and websites for help for PTSD but for those disorders that might be the ROOT cause of why we suffer from it.  I only wish ALL of you well.  I know how important it is to have resources and many people don’t know where to go or look for links or numbers so I hope that I’ve helped some of you out.  If you need ANYTHING, please don’t hesitate to email me at lori@loris-song.com and put PTSD in the subject line.  I will help you in any way I can within my capabilities.  GOD BLESS YOU ALL! Thanks for reading, Lori


More information on PTSD.

What is PTSD??

Posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is an emotional illness that develops as a result of a terribly frightening, life-threatening, or otherwise highly unsafe experience. PTSD sufferers re-experience the traumatic event or events in some way, tend to avoid places, people, or other things that remind them of the event (avoidance), and are exquisitely sensitive to normal life experiences (hyperarousal). Although this condition has likely existed since human beings have endured trauma, PTSD has only been recognized as a formal diagnosis since 1980. However, it was called by different names as early as the American Civil War, when combat veterans were referred to as suffering from “soldier’s heart.” In World War I, symptoms that were generally consistent with PTSD were referred to as “combat fatigue.” Soldiers who developed such symptoms in World War II were said to be suffering from “gross stress reaction,” and many who fought in Vietnam who had symptoms of what is now called PTSD were assessed as having “post-Vietnam syndrome.” PTSD has also been called “battle fatigue” and “shell shock.” Complex posttraumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD) usually results from prolonged exposure to a traumatic event or series thereof and is characterized by long-lasting problems with many aspects of emotional and social functioning.

Approximately 7%-8% of people in the United States will likely develop PTSD in their lifetime, with the lifetime occurrence (prevalence) in combat veterans and rape victims ranging from 10% to as high as 30%. Somewhat higher rates of this disorder have been found to occur in African Americans, Hispanics, and Native Americans compared to Caucasians in the United States. Some of that difference is thought to be due to higher rates of dissociation soon before and after the traumatic event (peritraumatic); a tendency for individuals from minority ethnic groups to blame themselves, have less social support, and an increased perception of racism for those ethnic groups; as well as differences between how ethnic groups may express distress. Other important facts about PTSD include the estimate of 5 million people who suffer from PTSD at any one time in the United States and the fact that women are twice as likely to develop PTSD as men

Almost half of individuals who use outpatient mental-health services have been found to suffer from PTSD. As evidenced by the occurrence of stress in many individuals in the United States in the days following the 2001 terrorist attacks, not being physically present at a traumatic event does not guarantee that one cannot suffer from traumatic stress that can lead to the development of PTSD

PTSD statistics in children and teens reveal that up to more than 40% have endured at least one traumatic event, resulting in the development of PTSD in up to 15% of girls and 6% of boys. On average, 3%-6% of high school students in the United States and as many as 30%-60% of children who have survived specific disasters have PTSD. Up to 100% of children who have seen a parent killed or endured sexual assault or abuse tend to develop PTSD, and more than one-third of youths who are exposed to community violence will suffer from the disorder.

AUTHORS NOTE:

I suffer from PTSD, I was in a POW type camp in Iran for 6 weeks. I went to Iran in 1998 with my Iranian husband and once there he refused to let me come home to the USA. The day after 9-11, anyone with TIES to Americans; that is friends or family were put into these camps, and were beat and raped. After I escaped I was flown to the American embassy in Dubai, UAE, since there is no American embassy in Iran. I walked off the plane into Detroit metro airport weighing 70 pounds and missing most of my teeth and had many closed head injuries. I have published a book and have a website dedicated to cause of womens rights in these countries…the reasoning behind this is included in my online version of my book at:

http://www.loris-song.com/

I hope you this information helps!