Please remember to TAKE YOUR MEDS!!!
I didn’t really realize how MUCH they made a difference until I was videotaped one time, and my GOD I looked and acted like a completely different person. One who was way too hyper and sensitive, and a little paranoid. I always think that I’m not good enough for anyone (especially after 911). After what was done to me, I couldn’t look people in the eye. It was so hard to believe that anyone would find anything interesting enough in me to want to be my friend. …UNLESS..they WANTED SOMETHING. It seems like being bipolar either leaves you in a total state of despair and insecurity or it gives you so much self esteem and confidence that it borders on the narcissitic mode. Sadly neither last for only a short time. I think that is why I wouldn’t take my meds, I liked those times of being so confident and arrogant and felt tlike I could conquer the world, and I would conquer a lot of things, but usually turned out bad in the end, but at the time it was happening I felt like GOD….like no one knows what I’m thinking and that I could covince someone to do anything. And usually when someone has that much confidence it produces an energy so strong that others feel it and you do end up getting away with a lot…take for example the movie “CATCH ME IF YOU CAN”. But as usual just like in the movie the Bipolar didn’t get the girl and live happily ever after, they usually get involved with the criminal justice system and is put in prison or other. Most Bipolars are HIGHLY INTELLIGENT, they theorize that this is based upon how the neurons fire into certain synapses of the brain, and the ones they touch are the ones responsible for intelligence and creative thinking. If they could only bottle the effects/affects that mania has and then only the GOOD CREATIVITY, then we would have some pretty brilliant people out there. But trust me stay on your meds and stay STABLE, CONSISTENT…well as consistent as you CAN BE. Be blessed with who is around you and willing to go through this with you.
Remember people we are geniuses so we have to stay calm to put up with the other people of this world:):):):)