Hellllloooo 2013!

 

Hi all,

I hope everyone feels refreshed and ready to start the New Year.  Nows the time to forget all those past mistakes and habits and time to get new ones.

You can never take back what you’ve said or done but what you can do is change your life so you never repeat those mistakes again.  I’m bipolar and it took me most of my life before I was diagnosed.  (That was in 2006), thanks to my hubby John.

He never gave up on me once he met me.  He met me while I was a stripper and going thru a hard time in life with drugs and not caring. (After I returned from IRAN).  I’m not excusing my behavior but at the time I didn’t care what I did, I never tried to hurt anyone but I was destroying myself.  My friend Jenni knew this guy named “John”, and he would come into the bar and talk to her.  I know this sounds excusing but John had been married 26 years in a basically feelingless marriage.  It was at the point they didn’t talk to each other they didn’t sleep together, but they had a wonderful son and didn’t want to ruin his life….or view of.   I met John on September 24th, 2005, by June 2006, he had filed for divorce and I was living with him.  But that did not come easy by any means.

The first time I met him was “brief” to say the least but there was something about that first kiss that just made me sit there and say “WOW” to myself….of course I couldn’t let him know I was interested, by doing that would be breaking all the rules.  I had been hurt deeply, not once or twice but four times.  Now after Mohammad I thought I would never love again, ever.  So everytime John came over I would turn off the lights and make him “THINK” I wasn’t home.  But he knew better, he had become more familiar with my actions than I ever thought one could in such a short time.   He would stand outside and knock and knock and yell, “Lori I know your in there”……and after about 15 minutes I’d finally answer the door.  I had to get ready and make sure I looked perfect (well as perfect as I could get myself) before I’d answer the door.  That would involve hair, makeup and clothing.

You also have to know at the time, I wore a hair extension (clip in) and lots of make-up and was stripping, so I didn’t look half bad.

If you go to the bottom of my website you can see what I mean about looking much better back then.   www.loris-song.com

John finally talked me into getting rid of the hairpiece and going au natural.  He said he would love me no matter what I looked like because I had a good heart, and was a good person, but I apparently just didn’t know this about me at the time.

Anyway he stuck it out with me, got me through rehab, got me treated for bipolar and went through all the flashbacks and seizures I had due to my brain trauma suffered in the camp.    He also went through a couple suicide attempts I made, of which one included drinking bleach.  He sold his business to stay home and take care of me, because he knew I was going through that time which a nervous breakdown was occuring, because I was just realizing and internalizing what happened to me in the camp.   For the longest time I tried to shrug it off, buck up and be strong.  I didn’t want anyone pitying me.  But I guess finally meeting someone who showed such caring and affection to me after all I put him through made me realize it was ok and safe to be sad over what happened to me.    I thank GOD for him everyday of my life.  And since I’ve met him I don’t want to end my life anymore either:)

He really is my KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR!  And if I had to go through all this again just to meet him, I WOULD!  I love you John.

With that I will say I only wish the best for all of you in 2013.  I am going to try to be happier, and less bitchy.  What some people don’t understand about BIPOLAR is that it’s a MOOD DISORDER not a mental illness.  We can not control our ups and downs and the medication just decreases the severity of it and the occurences.  I have learned that there will never be a day that I wake up HAPPY, I have to work at it.  Alot of you don’t understand this, but I think BIPOLAR people are born mad, sad and skeptical.  Any other emotion we must work for, especially if it is a GOOD ONE:)

I will try to make 2013 better than last year, and if I don’t interact on the blogs with you as much as I should, it’s because BIPOLAR people are by nature NOT SOCIABLE.  When someone comes to our door, we do a low roll over to the edge of the window and hope were hidden and when that person leaves we wipe our head (whew) and congratulate ourselves for getting thru that close call.

Most people go for walks and look at people to interact with, we look at the ground.  It’s not that we don’t want to interact, I think more that it’s we DON”T KNOW HOW, we are socially born AWKWARD at socializing.   But anyway…if you want to know more about BIPOLAR and it’s jokes on how we live (that may give you a better idea on us) this link might help with it’s cute cartoons.

https://www.facebook.com/TryingToMakeSenseOfThisBipolarMind

And here is a post I recently did that might help you understand:)

https://www.facebook.com/TryingToMakeSenseOfThisBipolarMind#!/TryingToMakeSenseOfThisBipolarMind/posts/464970476900217?notif_t=like

In a synopsis, I wish you well, I wish you love, I wish you greatness, but in the absence of any of this, just know I will always be your friend….Lori F. 1-2013

Link to my Discovery Channel Interview

I have updated information that was kind of disappointing to me.  I will be on Discovery Fit & Health on 12-27 @ 10PM  I’m on with two other people (this I didn’t know about) I’m the last line of the description where it says “a knight in shining armor turns out to be a girls nightmare”

Here is the link.

http://health.discovery.com/tv-schedules/daily.html?date=20121227.362

I have to start somewhere I guess to get this vital information out there regarding international domestic violence, and visiting foreign countries .

I hope you all watch it and share the link.   Thanks, Lori

Discovery Channel documentary AIR DATE!!!

Hi ALL,

I was informed by the producer of the Discovery Channel that my documentary would air on 12-272012 at 10pm on Discovery Fit and Health.  I will be looking forward to your comments, and I hope the truth will prevail, it could only help me and my future advertisement endeavors more!  Thank you all for supporting me through this time!

Lori

www.lori-song.com

I Love you DAD!

One year ago on 11-11-11 at 11:??AM  my Dad,  (Raymond Woodring Sr.) passed away from Lung/brain cancer.  I wish I had known him better and looking back I realize just how much of a dedicated Dad he had been.  He tolerated a lot, but still loved us unconditionally.  He LOVED BILL COSBY so I will end this with one of his quotes:

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.  ~Bill Cosby
I LOVE YOU DAD!!!

Ironically, after I escaped that camp in Iran, I returned back to the USA (in Detroit) on Nov. 14, 2001 My Dad’s birthday.

My Synopsis on this PTSD

Trenton you are hearing advice from a very knowledgable lady that is CYNTHIA PUDRITH, we know each other well.  We were both in the same PTSD group and I’ve come to love her like a sister, well in my case MORE THAN MY SISTER..(Long story).

Forget and ignore that other entity that thinks she knows everything.  She is only in here to stir up shit and make people feel bad.  It’s obvious she doesn’t know her ass from a hole in the ground.  And the only reason I approved her post is because I believe in freedom of speech.  We can learn from everyone even the dull and ignorant, even if it’s learning how to NOT BE LIKE THEM.

I get where your coming from.  My PTSD wasn’t caused by what yours was, but I was in an Iranian torture camp, and Cynthia has went through a HELLISH, HORRIFIC experience but I will let her share if she feels comfortable.

There will always be people like this KNOW NOTHING, and I’m not saying that to just condemn her, I TRULY BELIEVE THIS TO BE TRUE.

If you ever want to be excluded from any further posts of hers, let me know, but it sounds like you are more than holding your own, and you have the UTMOST RESPECT from me.

I’m so happy to have met you, and to know there are other human beings out there that genuinely care for others.  God Bless, Lori

 

Teaser Tuesday

Basically, you post a 2-sentence excerpt from a book on your own blog, just as I did on mine. Then you go to http://shouldbereading.wordpress.com and comment on the Teaser Tuesday post there, and include the link to your blog post in your comment. Other people who comment will go to your blog and leave comments there, and you’ll visit their blogs too. There are over 100 comments on the Should Be Reading post today.
Basically, this introduces readers to various books and drives readers to your blog, increasing your SEO (search engine optimization).

MY POST:

That night when the guards were smoking their opium and laughing, I tried to ask Faresh what she missed most about home.

Her reply was, “You must never think about home, you must think about this, this is your life now.”

From: “Lori’s Song” by Lori Foroozandeh

Amazon link: Available on KINDLE, Paperback and Hardcover.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/1432738291/?tag=losso-20&camp=14573&creative=327641&linkCode=as1&creativeASIN=1432738291&adid=0KESH5SQTHNBG1SRQGY4&&ref-refURL=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.loris-song.com%2F

Remembering 911

My students- Layla is on the Right End.

 

My heart goes out to those who lost loved ones, knew those who perished, or was involved with 911.  But I guess we were ALL involved with 911, it not only affected those directly involved but it involved us as a nation.  It involved our trust issues and brought back prejudice on such a high scale that some of us aren’t even sure to this day if we should trust ANYONE from the Middle East.

My view is that you can go on trusting just do so with discretion.  And it’s too bad that it has to be like that.  My story is a little different.

I was in Iran on 9/11.  On 9/12 I was taken as a prisoner and held captive in a POW type camp in the hills of Iran.  As far as I can guess we were held as leverage in case the USA decided to retaliate against the Middle East.   People who knew or were related to Americans were put into these camp.  I was raped, beaten and tortured for six weeks.  When I arrived home in November 2001 I weighed 70 pounds, had traumatic brain injury and most of my teeth had been knocked out.

What I’m about to say is crazy, but I don’t hate Muslims or Middle Easterners.  God knows I’ve tried and people can’t understand why, I don’t understand why.  I guess there were a couple years in Iran when I first moved there that were GREAT YEARS.  Not with my Iranian husband but with girls that I taught English to.  They weren’t just students they were my friends too.  Aged 10-19, these girls trusted me, so they would ask me questions about the USA, boys and religion.  Each day after class we’d sit down and just talk and they knew what they told me or asked I wouldn’t tell their parents.  We became so close and they were the ones who helped get me through Iran while I was kept there since my husband wouldn’t give his written permission to let me leave the country.  So I really enjoyed these girls and respect what they have to endure on a daily basis.  So I guess in my mind how can I hate a country or faith that these girls and others like them are a part of.  There are FANATICS in all religions, and those are the ones we have to fear.  Layla one of my students was killed in her fathers swimming pool for not being a virgin on her wedding night. I quit teaching soon after that.

I only wish the best for the survivors of this tragedy, but in reality we are all survivors and we are here today due to our choices in life.

Thank you for listening.  God Bless all!